Teeth In the Grass

It should really be the farthest thing from my mind.

However, I see his brown locks everywhere. I know I am grasping onto what is left of the past.

There's just never been anyone quite like Lovely.

Over lunch the other day, my mother pulled a side of her I have never seen. Randomly, a man's name fell upon her lips. She is so in love with Keith. However, she told me about the only other boy she was ever crazy about.

She said whenever they were together, there seemed to be such a strong magnetism. Something just clicked perfectly.

That was every second with Lovely.

I realize now why I forced myself to fall so quickly into the mad scientist. I was trying to prove to myself that Lovely did not command most of my thoughts. Now that I have come to my senses, all the other boys just don't match up with me.

Yes, they are very sweet and nice. But they don't keep me up at night. Every ounce of him seemed concentrated at me when we were together. These boys could care less.

I didn't mean to think about him. But shaggy browned haired boys keep appearing out of the corner of my eye. Die Artze keeps showing up on shuffle. Old pictures of old times keep digging themselves up to the top of the pile.

I forget that as I live here, as I grow and mature, so does he. I'm not the only one who changed. We were perfect for each other at different points of life. But I will always owe him.

He may have grown past what I loved, but he instilled a knowledge of what could possibly be perfect.

And for that, he is lovely.