Education on the fork in the road

I am a long way from having kids, but that still does not keep me from thinking.

I walk through school and see so many girls in the short short skirts. And the girl with 18 piercings, not because she likes them. Because others don't.

And of course, I can't forget the boys that only want to get high and drunk and into those short short skirts.

And I see all of their parents at school. And I think

Oh my God.

I am a fairly good girl. Yes, I can be way too serious and uptight. Yes, I have done some things, am doing some things, and will continue to do things that would make my mother flip out if she knew. But in the end, I have a pretty good head on my shoulders. I love myself to some degree, I have respect for everything, and I mostly make the right choices.

The thing that freaks me out is that I am probably going to have a child exactly like me. Strong willed and crazy. That can go many different ways.

I do resent a lot of things about my mother. I don't want to end up exactly like her, but I do want the same things for my children.

I don't want them to distrust me. I don't want them to ruin their lives. And most of all, I want them to be happy and satisfied with a good head on their shoulders.

You may be thinking. Grace, you are nuts. That is 20 years down the road.

Yep. And the things that I do now are going to influence how I act when I know that my child is doing them.

I already see myself with some of the same dysfunctions that my mother has. The apple does not fall very fall from the tree at all.

That is, unless the apple has a mind of its own.